The Captain Gives Thanks

A list of things that I am grateful for, with a few things I could do without.

Today is the day before Turkey Day and I am feeling particularly appreciative this year.  So in the spirit of Thanksgiving I have prepared a list of things that I am grateful for (and a couple of things that don’t put me in the spirit of giving.)  I have phrased my responses as “Ach, Ja” if the subject is good, and “Nicht, Nicht” if the subject is bad.  If you don’t understand the joke to which I am referring, watch this clip:

Anyway, without further ado here is my list.

My Metabolism – Ach, Ja

I came back from my honeymoon and noticed that I somehow managed not to gain any weight.  This is pretty amazing considering my poor diet and lack of movement during the two weeks I was gone for the wedding/honeymoon.  I hope that my metabolism continues to stay strong; Turkey Day traditionally hits me pretty hard.

Boating – Ach, Ja

Two weekends ago I took a boat out by myself in Destin, and last weekend we took a boat out in Sarasota while we were in town for Megan’s birthday.  Both times I had an absolutely fantastic afternoon.  I would spend everyday on a boat in the gulf if I could; it’s equal parts relaxation and excitement.  The past two times I was out, I had a ton of wild dolphin sightings.  In Sarasota I actually saw a dolphin jump out of the water twice like it was performing at Sea World!  In Destin a group of 6-10 dolphins swam under my boat for about 20 minutes.  They were so close I snapped a couple of pictures on my camera with no zoom.  Dolphins make an already enjoyable activity like boating simple amazing.  Here are a couple of pics I took.

Davely Bob’s Song of the Day – Ach, Ja

My No-Co homey and fellow Coffee Den alumni Davely Bob started sending out a song-of-the-day email about a month ago.   It is fantastic, the highlight of my work day.  He’s introduced me to some new music, and reminded me of bands that I had forgotten.  Davely Bob just finished up the second disc, so now is the perfect time for anyone interested to email him at davelybob@hotmail.com and get on the distribution list for disc three.

The Trailer for There Will Be Blood – Ach, Ja

I have watched this trailer at least twenty times; I’m already obsessed.  I’ve loved the director, P.T. Anderson, since the first time I saw Boogie Nights.  Anderson directing Daniel Day-Lewis with a score by the guitar player in Radiohead sounds like a dream to me.  I haven’t been this excited about a movie in quite a while.

The Writers Strike – Nicht, Nicht

Just as television was starting to get good again, the greedy corporations that own the networks felt the need to ruin everything.  Writers are about as reasonable as a group of people can be, and they justifiably went on strike.  The portion of revenue that writers get from DVD sales is laughable, but it is generous when compared to the 0% share of revenue they receive from streaming content online.  The fact that the corporate network owners are unwilling to give writers a reasonable share of this revenue is ridiculous.  The corporations allowing network programs to shut down over this issue is beyond ridiculous.  Supporting the writers as they strike against this unbelievable corporate greed should be a no-brainer for everyone.

Zombies – Ach, Ja

I’ve been on a big zombie kick lately for some unknown reason.  The last movie I watched was about zombies and so is the book I’m currently reading.  Zombies have traditionally been Bill’s thing, but I’ve been slowly gravitating towards them for awhile now.  I find the idea of zombies truly terrifying; a faceless sea of humanity literally trying to consume itself.  However, it’s the story of how mankind reacts to the threat that I find most interesting.  Well, that and zombies getting their heads blown off.

The Tepr remix of Yelle’s “ACDG” – Ach, Ja

This video is currently my favorite piece of pop-culture.  It somehow manages to combine three notoriously terrible things, French singers, European house music, and Eastern-European style, and creates something truly mesmerizing.

Florida Drivers – Nicht, Nicht

St. Louis is known to have some pretty aggressive drivers.  Florida has the exact opposite.  The slow and timid nature of Florida drivers recently caused me damage.  I was sitting in the right hand lane at a stop light waiting for the car in front of me to take a right turn on to a busy street.  After a couple minutes of heavy traffic, a pocket clears up and I prepare to make my right turn after the car in front of me turns.  Just as we both accelerate to make the turn, the driver in front of me decides to slam on her brakes and my car bounces off the back bumper of her SUV.  Apparently she saw a car way off in the horizon and incorrectly concluded that she didn’t have enough time to turn.  She made this decision at the last possible second while attempting to turn, which was way too late for me to stop.  I hit her as a result of her unreasonable timid ness, and yet it’s my fault.  Luckily for her, my little plastic car didn’t do any damage to her.  Unluckily for me, my hood now has a huge dent

My car still drives fine, and I didn’t have to submit it to my insurance company.  So I guess it could be worse.  Still, my car now looks like shit.  I hate Florida drivers; this would never happen in St. Louis.

Larry David – Ach, Ja

As a fan of Curb Your Enthusiasm, I was quite worried when I heard the news that Larry split with his wife before season 6 started in September.  I figured the show would take a bitter turn1 and loose its appeal.

I was flat wrong.  This season dealt with the split in a hilarious way and wound up being one of my favorites.  The season finale was by far the best episode; the last two minutes are a comedy goldmine.  I sure hope being single keeps him bored enough to make several more seasons.

The Bar Cabinet – Ach, Ja

Megan and I have had our eye on a specific bar cabinet for a couple of years.  It’s big, beautiful, and makes storing alcohol seem glamorous.  After years of dreaming about this cabinet, it will be greeting me when I go home tonite.  Megan’s parents are driving down to Tallahassee to spend Turkey Day with us, and they are bringing our newly purchased bar cabinet with her.  This specific act of kindness makes them the coolest in-laws ever.  I’m so excited about this bar cabinet that I’ve contemplated sleeping next to it tonite.

And Finally, Shortcake – A big Ach, Ja

Shortcake is a blog that I’ve been reading since the beginning of the year.  This blog was a big inspiration for my return to writing.  It reminded me of all of the things that I enjoy about writing.  When it came time to create my new blog, I basically stole Shortcake’s format2 and put my spin on it.

I want to give credit where credit is due, so a big-up to Shortcake.  Imitation is flattery.

That’s it for round one of Ach, Ja and Nicht Nicht.  Hope everyone has a happy Turkey Day.

Ciao,

Raoul

1  Well, more bitter than usual…

2  In fact this column is just a rip-off of “Champs and Chumps” from Shortcake.

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